a completely pointless list of made-up diseases and medical conditions

My friend Jenna and I came up with this list back in January, while bored at a bluegrass show in Nashville. I had forgotten all about it until last weekend, when I was clearing out some notes stored in my phone. I present it here for no other reason than the fact that it amuses me:

Spelunker’s Droop

Ingrown Nostril

Restless Vulva Syndrome

Fart Murmur

Knee Crabs

Pet Shop Boil

Tennis Rectum

Hungry Hungry Hip

Auctioneer’s Urethra

Blooming Bunion

Spontaneous Lactation

Belle And Sciatica


Yo Gabba Goiter

Dislocated Taint

Multiple Skeletorosis

Elbow Pus

Athlete’s Eye

Snus Knuckle

Sodomy’s Wallet

Hubba Uvula

Overactive Pikachu

Anal Palpitations

Calloused Colon

The Lupus Of The Sierra Madre

Rebel Yell

Ludacris’ Disease


Feel free to make up your own in the comments.

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